Getting feedback from recruiters can actually be counterproductive. This is why you may actually be hurting yourself by asking.
One of the most common complaints I see on platforms like LinkedIn is that frustrated job seekers want "feedback" from recruiters. Actually, it's understandable. If you're looking for work and not having luck landing a dream job, then naturally you'd want to know what you can do to have more success in interviews. But, as counter-intuitive as it might seem, you perhaps should just walk away; and here's why you should consider it...
You're probably not going to hear the truth, really
As disappointing as it may be to not get facetime with your employment agent to discuss your career, recruiters are not the same as talent agents. In Los Angeles, the agents that manage actors, for example, often take the time to consult with their clients about career goals and the like. This is because those agent-client relationships can last years, not weeks as with employment agents. Headhunters, simply put, don't do that (unless you're dealing with elite firms that do executive searches).
First thing's first: The employer may not even tell the recruiter why they passed on a candidate. Often times, things move incredibly fast when headhunters are placing candidates; and there isn't enough time in the day for all of the back-and-forth with the employers. The old adage is still true: Time is money.
Having said all of that, the employer may not have liked the candidate for any number of (silly) reasons:
And the list goes on. Of course we don't live in a perfect world, and people judge us. So, in short, if you did not get the job, it may have had nothing at all to do with your skills; and if you push the recruiter to give you an answer, they may just make something up and say your answers in the interview weren't thorough enough when it's far from the truth. So, the fact of the matter is, it doesn't matter if you're given the truth or not. At the end of the day, the employer didn't want you because they didn't think you were a fit for a hundred different reasons. In short, don't dwell on it.
It's better to move on and put energy into applications to companies where there will be a better fit. Remember, when one door closes, another opens.
Written for assistants and estate managers working for celebrities, CEOs, UHNW families, billionaires and royalty